The Law of Aleady

If this is the first time you have spoken wtih your child's teacher this year, well...shame on you. You really need to have done this already.

The good news is you can start over again next year with the next teacher.

The Law of Not My Kid

One of the most difficult type of parents teachers have to deal with is the Not My Kid parent. An NMK parent is the kind who believes their child could do not wrong and any problem is always the fault of someone else.

A couple of years ago we had to talk to the elementary principal of my son's school about a bullying issue. My wife is a school teacher and I'm a family therapist. The poor principal must have thought she was about to deal with the ultimate set of NMK parents. When I opened the meeting by saying we were not NMK parnets and wanted to know and deal with our son's part in all this, huge relief swept across her face.

The point is this - the quickest way to get a teacher on your side is to say and demonstrate the you are not NMK parents.

The Law of Listening

Stephen Covey said it the best:

"Seek first to understand, then to be understood."

Listen to what the teacher has to say. A teacher sees your child five days a week in situations that you do not get to see. There is much to learn when you pay attention.

The Law of a Team

When you handle these kind of converstations, the mindset to have is that we are on the same team, working on what is best for this particular child.

The Law of Accountability

At the same time, as parents it is our responsibility to hold the teacher accountable if they are not doing their job. If it does not get resolved at this level, you can always go higher.

Jeff Herring

Jeff is a marriage and family therapist, singles and relationship coach, mentor coach, speaker, syndicated relationship columnist and author.

Jeff has a full time private practice in Tallahassee in which he specializes in couples, teen and parent counseling. He also is a relationship coach specializing in working with couples and singles. Some of his professional activities include:

==> Internationally syndicated relationship columnist through Knight-Ridder/Tribune Media Services, with a weekly readership of over 10 million worldwide

==> Sought after speaker for organizations, associations, churches, and corporations

==>Twice weekly appearances on The Steve and Sara Show on Magic 107.1

==> Author of "Keep the Changes: 52 Tools for Successful Living" a collection of his best columns, as well as several e-books including "How to Create a Passionate and Loving Relationship.........Forever," "How to Beat the BOZOs: Dealing with difficult people without becoming one," and "Tame Your Teen: THE survival guide for parenting your teenager.

==> Founder and CEO of TheArticleGuy.com

==> Founder and CEO of SecretsofGreatRelationships.com

==> Founder and CEO of ParentingYourTeeanger.com

==> Founder and CEO of ToolsforSuccessfulLiving.com

==> President of BuildingYourIdealPractice.com

==> President of ConsciousDatingTallahassee.com