If youre a football widow and the mother of a small child, its a question you may have to face this fall. You may be hit with variations:
Why does Daddy paint his face blue (red/green/silver, etc.)?;
Why does Daddy yell at the TV?; or,
Why does Daddy hate the blind man named Ref?
Over the years, youve come to dread September, but youve managed to cope with this dirty little family secret. Still, its impossible to explain to a child the concept of football, the most complicated sport on the planet. And, shes probably not ready or able to accept the fact that shes a football orphan, that Daddy has a madness that seizes him every autumna madness that turns him into a raving maniac, who wouldnt notice, if the house caught fire. Can she possibly understand that her real Daddy will be back, sometime in January? (Although, depending on how the season went, he may be unusually giddy or depressed, for a few weeks)
Dont even try explainingyou wont be able to hide the underlying resentment you have for this incomprehensible and selfish sport, which steals your husband from his family, four months a year. Instead, try using these afternoons as a time for special activities involving you and your child.
A trip to the park or a scenic drive can be fun and educational. Many city zoos and museums have special Saturday and Sunday rates in the fall, just for moms and their kids. With autumn weather unpredictable in many places, its a great time to take in a movie with your daughter, or shop for back-to-school needs.
One fact you should know, by nowyou cant change Daddy or his devotion to the game. Its a part of who he is now. Men actually ask each other, as a way of introduction, Whos your team?, the same way they ask, Whats your profession? , or Are you married? Its a way many men identify themselves. So dont expect or demand that Dad give up his games to be a part of every weekend outing.
Chances are, though, Daddy has a secret he hasnt confessed, even to you: Theres a part of him that wishes his football addiction didnt take up so much time. He really does want to be a part of his familys life.
So, instead of keeping him from the games, try bartering the time with himfor every hour he spends watching football, ask him to commit an hour to his family. Youd be surprised how many men will grab the opportunity to solve this dilemma, and still be able to watch their games, guilt-free.
Beware, thoughat some point, hell try his best to get your child to love his game as much as he does, killing both birds with one stone. And, who knows? He may be successfulyour daughter could be a cheese-head before shes five. In that case, be prepared to spend a lot of weekend afternoons the same way you have, since you met him. Napping. |
